Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Slow Learner = Jail Time

When I get home today I am going to see if the barrier I built yesterday to keep Anabel (the goat) from jumping the knee wall and getting into the hay stall. For three days, I have come home to the most mournful wailing and bawling. Now you know that Anabel is a Drama Queen of great talent. So, I really didn't give it much credit the first day. I thought she was letting me know that Dinner Is Late and that was it. When I got to the barn, I discovered that she was in the stall with the Mean Hen who is setting right now and that she wasn't happy. In fact, she felt very hot and that scared me terribly!

However, the second day, she was back in the stall, none the wiser for her experience, and the Mister was feeding her as I was coming home late. He made her stay in the stall until Everyone Else Had Eaten (Anabel is the alpha doe and Always Eats First) before he let her out. She wasn't happy, but that is the choice she made.

The third day, yeppers, guess who was in jail, yet again, and still unhappy? At this point, I think even the Mean Hen was over it as she fussed the whole time until I let Anabel out again. It was then that I decided I would have to create a barrier.

So, I cut a 2 x4 x6 the length of the stall and nailed it 12" from the knee wall top. Then, I cut a fence panel to fit over the opening, nailing it to the knee wall, the board, and the joists. Hollie, the cow, watched, amused. The goats, however, were not allowed to see the renovation until they had fed. Anabel, at last check this morning, was nudging and exploring it, looking for a hole, I am sure. I don't think she will find it.

And, if she does, the Mean Hen may have free reign on her. Trust me. Anabel will lose.

Monday, September 26, 2011

Wrong Side ...

... of the bed. That is the pure description of my day. I got up late and on the wrong side of the bed.

I was wet all weekend from torrential downpours at the Grayson Highlands Festival. And tired to the bone, to boot. So, I overslept. By an hour. I ate cinnamon toast and peanut butter on the way to work. I dropped both on my pants. It looks like I peed in my pants because of the grease stain. Lovely.

I didn't get to wash my hair because I overslept. A pony tail on Monday is a sure sign that the week is starting off on the wrong foot.

The Mister has annoyed me to the point that I just don't even want to speak his name. Just saying, it could be his fault that I overslept. No finger pointing... just saying...

The car is still jumping off and on.... after spending $200 at the mechanics last week and didn't want to run this morning which made me Even Later. I shouldn't be annoyed at the car. At least it has worked. Hard. For nearly 500,000 miles. Maybe I feel like the Mister should do the same...

Wendy's has the worst salad in the world. I guess it is true you get what you pay for; if I had gotten up on time, I was going to have a lovely Amish yogurt cheese and veggie sandwich for lunch. And it was fresh. And still is.... in my refrigerator.

I am wearing tennis shoes because I overslept and didn't lay my clothes out last night because I was too tired and then I couldn't find my knee high hose this morning. At least the shoes are black. Like my pants. And don't have peanut butter on them. Unlike my pants.

You know, as I think about it, maybe I should have stayed in bed instead of getting out on the wrong side....

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

I Think I Missed That One

My Composition II students are working on a research paper in which they are required to interview a family member. Their interview questions had to be submitted to me before they could proceed. This is what one student submitted:

1. Where did our family come from?
2. Did any of our family members fight in the Cival (sic) War?
3. Did any of our family members fight in World War I or II?
4. Did any of our family members fight in the Vitamins War?

Okay. I think I missed that war...

Lesson: Never trust spell check...

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

You Have To Be Kidding

The bank called today.
Someone has stolen all my checking account information (routing number and account number) and made counterfeit checks with all the correct information EXCEPT the right bank.
We all know crooks are stupid or they wouldn't be crooks.
What do you call one who can't even get the information correct? Really Stupid???

Friday, September 16, 2011


... I talked with the Airman for an hour. Fabulous.
... it is cold -- 48-degrees still.
... is the day before yet another festival... and I have soap to wrap.
... I need to make more castile soap for another festival in November.
... i would rather be knitting something very soft and fuzzy.
... the chicken coop needs cleaning.
... the goat stalls do, too.
... there is still a little more to do in the attic and then I am starting to clean one out building. before-I-awoke-dream was about my friend Arwen telling me that I wasn't sanitary enough to touch dishes her children ate from while I was watching the biggest horse in the world carry FIVE adults on its back across my backyard, but it wasn't my backyard really, while my car was running in the front driveway. Huh?? Where did that come from?

I think it is going to be a strange, busy day! You?

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Gotta Love It ...

As other teachers will tell you, as students get older, they get more confident that they are wiser and more educated than their instructors. By the time a kid reaches college, they have all the answers, so much so that I believe all Presidents should be under 20 years old and all Congress people should be between 16-19. Let's face it, after 20, it is all downhill and we realize just How Stupid We Really Are and How Little We Really Know.

Case in point: this is an email I received last week regarding a quiz:

Hello Ms. H,

I just completed the quiz for the material on Mather, Bradstreet, etc., and was a bit disconcerted at receiving a 72. I double checked each answer against the text, powerpoints, and documents, and it seems that 7 questions incorrect is a large range of error given my careful procedures. Would it be possible to review the test and see which questions I answered incorrectly, and is their any possibility of a grade revision? Please let me know.

Yea. Right. Gotta love the statement "large range of error given my careful procedures." This is an 18-year-old, by the way. And, believe it or not, this kid talks just as he writes.

"I bet you watch Star Trek," I asked, sort of.

"Wow! Yes. I do! Spock is my favorite character!"

I think it is going to be a long fall....

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Helloooooo... Are you here?

Howdy Campers,
The respite has done me a wonder of good and I am ready to start sharing more of Pandemonium Palace, also known as Lazy Bee Farm.

What have I done since we chatted last?
1.) Gone back to work.

2.) Had a wood shed built. And filled most of it.

3.) Painted on the front door.

4.) Cleaned, and I mean seriously cleaned, the porch (it wraps around two sides of the house -- it is not for the faint of heart), the yard, and my front flower beds.

5.) Saved one goat from dying -- darn parasites!

6.) Made soap, soap, soap, soap, and soap.

7.) Worked the farmer's market.

8.) Worked on festival.

9.) Cleaned the attic -- mostly. It is a very large attic with most of the things from the Airman's three bedroom house. Yeah. This has been more fun that a trip to the dentist on the day after Christmas.

10.) Knit dishcloths, a lot.

11.) Solved the mystery of the chest pain -- ulcer. No more Boylan's Cherry Soda for me... I seriously considered crying about this one...
There is more, but why tell it all the first day back?? Pictures are to come as I have become quite proficient, thank you, with the camera and movie making talents!

How in the world have you been? I have missed you all!