First Day Musings: Finding Beauty

Whitetop Mountain

We live where it is beautiful all year round. Spring. Summer. Fall. Winter. Every season has something terrific to offer and dazzle the hungry eye and heart.

Creek apples we discovered on the far side of our creek. 

They make delicious applesauce.

Beauty surrounds us; however, isn't it so easy to overlook it? We see it every day. It grows familiar and, before we know it, we no longer see the beauty around us.

Coming home from Los Angeles, January 2,

after attending the Tournament of Roses Parade. 

It only takes leaving home, though, to bring that beauty fresh to our minds when we return to the place where we are loved. We are home.

Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it. -- Confucious

Look for beauty this week!

First Day Musings --- I Quit

Picture the most lovely beach you have ever seen. That is what I wanted to be right here, but my camera and computer won't talk this morning, so you are on your own to create your own perfect world today. Instead, they are behaving link Maggie Simpson and Gerald, the One-Eyebrowed-Baby...

And this leads me to what is on my mind today.

I quit.

I quit worrying about "being" a certain way.
I quit comparing myself to others.
I quit thinking I am the only person who hasn't achieved the Nirvana of whatever it is I am supposed to achieve.
I quit enabling bad choices.
I quit listening to that stupid voice in my head that says, "Well, you know.." and then proceeds to tell me what a failure I am.
I quit rushing and missing the beauty around me.
I quit worrying about how to get someone else to agree with me about how to do, feel, or think about...
I quit engaging in conversations that always begin with "I think", "I want", "I need."
I quit believing that it is unkind to stand up for myself.
I quit delaying my dreams to support others who can't even get out of the chair to start working on theirs.
In short, I quit.

You know, spending more than 60 hours alone traveling really gives one time to think. I needed that.

What are you thinking about this most marvelous day??

First Day Musings --- "Act Like You Are Somebody"

What has happened to civility?

My Grandmother had the nicest way to remind us of how to behave whenever we went somewhere. "Act like you are somebody," she would caution, meaning for us to remember that we came from a decent family with values, morals, and, most of all, a reputation of being civil. In short, don't get out there and do something unkind, mean, or illegal.

There seems to be a trend in acting not like we are "somebody", but rather acting like we are Somebody -- somebody more important, smarter, meaner, and self-centered. Need to pull out in traffic? Well, you will just have to wait. Waiting for a parking place? Oops, I was faster. Someone says something you don't agree with? Well, just tell them how stupid they are.

Used to be, we could disagree and still be friends. We could worship differently, live differently, and even vote differently, but we still could be polite and courteous. Where did that go?

Just once and a while, I would like to hear, "Yes'm." Or, I'd like to see someone hold a door for another person; see a car let another pull in ahead of them; or, listen to a discussion that didn't include a rash of profanity that would make a pirate blush. Wouldn't it be refreshing to see the Golden Rule really a part of every day life?

How do we change the world? Well, really, we can't. We can only change the world we live in daily. How can you be more civil in your world? How can you encourage others to be more civil?

When once the forms of civility are violated,

there remains little hope of return to kindness or decency.

 - Samuel Johnson, British author

First Day Musings --- Under Tension

If you look carefully, you can see there are three

different patterns in the towels. I haven't cut them

apart yet, so they are difficult to photgraph.

Everyone was gone last night, so I sat down to the living room loom and finished weaving the towels. They are wonderful and I am very pleased with them. As I cut them off the loom, they sprang to life. Under tension, you see, things on the loom look very different. The texture is different --- tighter and more stretched out, less detail. And the shape even changes --- things "relax" when the tension is released, allowing the project to transform into the shape it is meant to be. These are fascinating things, really, because everything on a loom starts out square or rectangle. It is the nature of it. And, all things are "put on" the same -- with warps and then wefts. Yet, each project emerges differently. It makes me think of knitting where one uses only two stitches, a knit or purl, and yet the options seem numberless.

And, so it is with life.

We are all born with essentially the same things .. eyes, ears, hands, brain... desires, dreams, hopes... Yet, it is what we do with them, especially under tension, that determines what we become.

I reflected on this as I dropped off to sleep the other night. Then, I dreamt of the option of going back into my life and changing Just One Thing. Instantly, I was whisked back to when I was 28 in my little dear house in Florida. I loved that house. My life seemed perfect. It was just me and the Airman. I had a good job and was getting by. But, I made a decision that changed my path forever.

As I stood there in my back doorway, looking over the garden and all my fruit trees (I even had an avacado tree --- heaven!), I realized that there was no place to put my goats or chickens. This made me unhappy and I realized that I didn't want to change that moment or any other. Each had lead me to where I am Right Now. And, Right Now, I am satisfied. I woke up content and somewhat astonished by the realization.

Aren't there times we want to go back and change Just One Thing so our lives would be perfect (or so we want to believe)? Yet, if we did, we would not enjoy the many things we love now. It is rather like my weaving project. I had one warp on the loom, but had the option of making five different patterned towels based on just how I raised the harnesses. Each is unique, but each started with the same stuff. It was what I chose that made the difference.

First Day Musings -- Do It Now!

One of my biggest faults is the fact that I have a tendancy to procrastinate. A lot. It's not that I don't want to do the things I say I will, but that it seems so many things get on the plate that I put off many of those that aren't like dessert. Let's face it, we all would rather have dessert than the liver, right?

I read some place that procrastinating was like carrying around a huge weight on one's back. Until we complete the tast, it looms over us rather like the Sword of Damocles. This is a fact and I can attest to it! Whenever I do this I always promise myself that I won't do it again and that I will be more focused Next Time and Get It Done -- whatever "it" may be.

Now, you ask, how has that worked for me?? Not Too Good. A few years ago, I put together a list of all the started projects. I am ashamed to admit that it filled a legal pad page and then some. Yeppers. That's me. What happened? Well, I put off looking at it until I lost it, of course!

As we are approaching the New Year, I have been thinking of what my new word will be. This year it was moderation and I feel that I did pretty good -- all things considered. I didn't work too much as I took this past summer off from teaching. I didn't grow a big garden or can anything. After all, we need to eat the 57 quarts of green beans we have already (Have I mentioned that I don't like green beans... so why do we have 'em?? For the MIster, of course!) I haven't bought any new yarn or weaving fiber this year -- only the cotton for the dishcloths I sell at the Farmer's Market and even that I bought on sale. I didn't go wild and buy a lot of clothes for work this year (I always swear I will lose weight -- and I did!). And, I haven't replaced the 22 eye shadows I had to toss because they were too old (Really. I happen to love eye shadow. I confess. I need a 12 step program when Clinque has a new colour.I am working on it....).

So, the moderation thing has worked pretty well for me.

This coming year's word? Well, I am going to work on it. Really. After final exams. And after grades are in. And the towels are off the living room loom. And I have touched up the paint in the bathroom. And painted the dining room. And... sigh... let's just say, I'm thinking about it....

First Day Musings --- I Sing Of The Body Electric

When Walt Whitman wrote the poem that he entitled "I Sing of the Body Electric" he was vilified. The poem celebrates the human body and all it can do and be. This morning, I am reminded of that poem and how lovely it is. He wrote:

The love of the Body of man or woman balks account—the body itself balks account;  That of the male is perfect, and that of the female is perfect.

He goes on to write how lovely every body is for what it can do and how the body reflects its owner. It is a  lovely poem by any account...

I am reminded of it today after spending yesterday working outside. We cleaned the chicken coop (overdue by a month!), hung new outdoor lights (with the days shorter we find we need these to feed on occasion), hauled trash to the dump, and ran errands. Our bodies lifted, stooped, squatted, stretched, crawled (okay, I confess, some of the coop required on the ground attention), walked, scurried, and ambled. By last night, my legs and feet were telling me how hard they had worked and how grateful they would be for a little elevation and rest. I agreed.

We choose how we live and, really, how we die. My most favorite poem is "Ulysses"  by Tennyson. The poem centers of the mythological character Ulysses and how he, upon growing older, realizes that his life isn't over, but rather, he can still dream and do. My favorite lines are these:

Tho' much is taken, much abides; and tho'
We are not now that strength which in old days
Moved earth and heaven, that which we are, we are,--
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield. 


These past months I have watched people a lot more than usual. I have thought about their choices and their lifestyles -- not in a judgmental way, oh no!, but as a matter of information --- trying see how we choose to grow old. I know that I am; I am past the double nickel, yet my mind tells me that I am still that buoyant 24-year-old who could do anything. What I have discovered is this: those who remain young in their minds are young in their bodies. Those who choose to do what they can, regardless of infirmary or illness, are much happier than those who sit on their tuffett and wail that they just can't do such and such any longer. Those who  stay involved in life, going, doing, giving, caring for others are much happier and better satisfied than those who don't. It matters not what the body is capable of doing, it is the attitude of the person, to do what one can, that seems to determine their joy and contentment.

I have a friend whose mother was found patching a hole in her roof when she was 94. I love that. This is the woman I want to be. I plan to sing of this old body until it is transformed into the perfect one I am promised on the other side. Until then, this one will do just fine.

First Day Musings: Possibility

I dwell in Possibility--
A fairer House than Prose--
More numerous of Windows--
Superior--for Doors--
Of Chambers as the Cedars--
Impregnable of Eye--
And for an Everlasting Roof
The Gambrels of the Sky--
Of Visitors--the fairest--
For Occupation--This--
The spreading wide my narrow Hands
To gather Paradise-- 

-- Emily Dickinson

This is The Day Before Classes Start. It is a Day of Possibilities. Everyone has an A. Everyone is happy. Everyone is successful. I haven't gained 12 pounds from medicinal application of chocolate.

There is something about Starting that Is So Good. 

"Well," said Pooh, "what I like best -- " and then he had to stop and think. Because although Eating Honey was a very good thing to do, there was a moment just before you began to eat it which was better than when you were, but he didn't know what it was called. -- Winnie the Pooh, The House at Pooh Corner

Yeah. Like that.

I think this is why I am addicted to Starting. I love the feeling of success before something can fail. I like the joy of completion before it is done. I crave the affirmation that I can do it before I have.

He has made everything beautiful in its time. -- Eccelsiasties 3:11

So, today I am going to dwell in possibilities. I am going to embrace the happiness of The Day Before and hope that it continues to The Next Day. As Pooh, I am going to anticipate the satisfaction of what is to come and believe it is every bit as delish as I can hope.

And, the cynic in me is ordering new pants....

First Day Musings --- Creative Homemaking

Yarn holder and handmade knitting needles: Riverslea Farm

The Hidden Art of Homemaking, by Edith Shaeffer

Knitting project: Hannah's hat with Bear Yarn (shetland wool)

Several bloggers have written about Edith Schaeffer's The Hidden Art of Homemaking, and, frankly, after reading it the first time, I didn't get it. Where were the hints on organization? Recipes? Patterns? Anything, please?? Nothing of that kind was there. It was a book about creativity and how to tap in and use it in your life -- not just your home.

The first publishing was in 1971 -- how well I recall that year! I was in love with Iverson James McCann and wanted to live on his family farm in South Georgia growing peanuts. Yeah. It was a good year. But, if you can remember those days, you recall, too, that was a time of great confusion about gender roles and Just Whom Am I? This book seems to answer some of those lingering questions.

Homemaking is neither masculine or feminine. Rather, it is our way of attempting to create a full life which honors our Creator. And, since we all have the Breath of God in us, we are all, to some extent, creators as well.

So many people like to cite the Proverbs 31 woman as the perfect wife. However, if you look closely at the scripture, you will see that she is strong, wise, hard working, physically active, prudent, determined, and CREATIVE. Aren't these qualities that describe men as well as women? Isn't this really what all of us should be? Women are not meant to "love pink, fluffiness, glitter, and watching men's muscles" as I read on a blog not long ago. Frankly, I nearly tossed my cookies. Such a statement demeans a woman, but also the man, if all he is good for is physical labor and admiration.

Women are strong. We are wise. We are demanding. We are tender. But, most of all, we are just as unique as the men we adore. Flex those muscles, emotional, mental, spiritual AND physical! It is within your means to create the life you want to live. As Shaeffer writes: "The Christian should have more vividly expressed creativity in his daily life, and have more creative freedom, as well as the possiblity of a continuing development in creative activities." In short, why are you just sitting here? Get up and create something beautiful!

First Day Musings -- Get Your Head Out

Apple woke us at dawn screaming bloodly murder. She is a four-month-old doe whose mother, frankly, isn't the sharpest knife in the drawer, if you know what I mean. And it seems our Apple has inherited that intellictual ability as well. Yes, I adore Apple. She is cinnamon with just the tiniest bit of white on one back hoof and on her left side. And she has this great way of tilting her head and "flying" her ears when she looks at you. She is the doe in the front in our banner, if you care to take a look. She is cute in spite of the fact that she should be on the short bus.

But, I digress.

It seems that our Miss Apple has a knack for not realizing the size of her head. And as such, she is always getting it stuck somewhere -- the fence usually. But, because she is so sweet tempered, she just sits down and screams until we come cut her out -- no fighting, pulling, or wrestling -- just calm resignation to the situation until someone comes.

As I went out in my jammies to cut her out this morning, I was thinking how her attitude could serve the two-legged variety varmint as well. How many times do we push and pull in a situation that we really have no control over at all? How many times do we spend a lot of energy grousing when really all we have to do is just sit quietly and wait?

I am reminded of the Scripture: “Be still, and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:10).

Maybe that is just the lesson silly Miss Apple has taught me. That, and to keep the wire cutters handy...

First Day Musings -- Wisdom

As my master's thesis advisor, John Higby often made me so angry that I could spit nails. In fact, frankly, the end of our relationship was not pretty. I had written no more than five drafts of my thesis (over 120 pages each time!) and at the time I had four children I was raising,  plus the farm, drove more than an hour each way to graduate school, and was working full-time teaching. And, each time I submitted a draft, he would return it with one line, "Something is missing." Well, it came down to either publish or lose my full-time position; I pitched a fit to the graduate dean and showed her my drafts. In short, I was published within three days. John and I never spoke again.

In spite of all this, I learned a great deal from him: bibliography and research methods; never, never, never use a split infinitive no matter what the handbooks say; Samuel Johnson was the funniest and smartest man of the 18th century (and maybe even today); and stop talking before you talk yourself in a hole. But, the best thing I learned from him was this:

You can't choose who you work with; you can't choose who you vote with. But, by golly, you can choose who you eat and drink with.

(Notice the sentence ends with a preposition; maybe he wasn't so hard to get along with after all...)

How true.

One of the cardinal rules in our family is never, never, never socialize with anyone you work with beyond the average meal on campus or chit-chat in the hallway. And, I mostly observe this rule. The only exception was marrying the Mister, but he works in another section of the college and we never see each other at work unless there is a problem in my classroom with the technology and I call him. Otherwise, I do not and will not socialize with my co-workers.

It makes sense. First, people you work with will not forgive or forget anything you confide about another co-worker, family, or friend. And second, people you work with will lose respect for you if they know all about you. Familiarity breds contempt and all that.

It's that simple.

John was a wise man and many times I have thought of this over the past years. Whenever an invitation comes to an after-work event, I always decline. Beyond the fact that I really look at my teaching gig as just a way to pay my bills, which doesn't mean I don't work hard, I really just don't have much in common with most folks unless they have goats or enjoy needlework. I don't gossip; I don't drink; I don't eat meat. I think that covers most social functions, don't you?

So, Dr. Higby, whereever you are, thank you for the wisdom you imparted. You have saved me more than once with these sage words!

What about you? Do you think one should mix work with one's personal life?

First Day Musings --- He's Alive

I adore this song. Enjoy and Happy Easter