An Open Letter to the "Media"

Dear Media,

I am breaking up with you. I know this comes as a shock, but you have finally betrayed my confidence one too many times. I know. You want to keep me aware of the many issues that fill our world, but your concept of the world and mine are very different.

Brace yourself. I do not care if Tiger Woods has night putted with every female caddy in North America. He plays golf for a living. I did not vote for him. He makes no decision that directly impacts my life for good or bad. He has made a gazillion dollars playing golf. That is all. He plays a game well. His choices are between him and his wife. Not me. I, take a breath, don't care. We have no commitment.

I know this comes as a shock to you since I have forgiven your previous transgressions: making Michael Jackson a freak (whether he was or not); dogging the wife of John Edwards or even that creepy Ted What's-His-Name; and we won't even discuss that horrible eighteen months that you haunted little Brittany Spears. Their personal life is not my business. I don't want to know.

What I do want to know is:

When will our men and women come home from Afghanistan and Iraq?
Is global warming really an issue?
What is working in the economy?
How can I lose twenty pounds in two days (oops, that one slipped in)?

I know you have promised to be dependable, but I feel that our trust is broken and can no longer be repaired. I hope you will be able to move on. I have.

Sincerely,

Matty