Give me an F!

Student: Why did you give me an F in the course?

Me: You didn't do much work. This is what you earned.

Student: What do you mean I didn't do the work? I did!

Me: We had 12 tests, 32 writing assignments, 1 formal report, and a presentation. You took three tests and did five writing assignments. Doesn't it make sense that this grade should be an F?

Student: Well, a body shouldn't have to do all the work to get a C.

Me... banging my head on the desk. I should have been a bus driver....

I Think I Missed That One

My Composition II students are working on a research paper in which they are required to interview a family member. Their interview questions had to be submitted to me before they could proceed. This is what one student submitted:

1. Where did our family come from?
2. Did any of our family members fight in the Cival (sic) War?
3. Did any of our family members fight in World War I or II?
4. Did any of our family members fight in the Vitamins War?

Okay. I think I missed that war...

Lesson: Never trust spell check...